xo Sherry
Chapter 17 - Mine, Forever
How Do You Want Me? via anntastic23
"'You're blushing, love.' He whispered...
...'Am I making you blush?'
'You are.' I smiled again, seeing him enjoy watching me squirm.
'How do you want me tonight?' His voice was low, sultry.
'Naked,' I whispered, watching his eyes move down my body.
'Do you want dirty Edward? Or do you want slow Edward?' He pushed himself away from the door, but did not walk towards me.
'Slow.' I musmured. Then, unsure: 'How do you want me?' I asked, I couldn't explain my nerves. I was hot, the heat suddenly oppressive.
'I want you how I always want you: wet, around me, moaning in my ear.' He smiled slowly, the look bordered on a snarl....
His breath let out in a low exhale, his hands falling limply to his side. 'You see yourself so clearly in some ways, and not in others. You are amazing.'
I blinked and looked away from him for a moment, trying to figure out his mood. I looked back at him and felt the worry in my face, heard the worry in my voice. 'Will you miss it?'
'I think I will be too busy worshipping you to miss anything.' His answer delivered without any hesitation. His eyes burned into me. Again I registered how badly he wanted me. Forever. I felt my cheeks warm at his answer. We both laughed.
I looked around the room, trying to find the invisible haze of tension settling around us. 'What...what is going on with you tonight?' I asked finally, quietly.
He smiled at me, trying to relax his tense body. 'I've tried to explain. I'm not doing a good job explaining. I fall more in love with you every day. I feel a little crazy.' He laughed, shaking his head. 'I can't express it well, and I am having a hard time containing it. I don't mean to be weird tonight. I just can't get over...this.' He pointed to the space surrounding me.
My voice was a whisper: 'Baby, come.' I felt relief knowing what he needed. I started walking backwards towards the bedroom, my hand reaching for him.
He walked towards me, enveloping me in his arms, his lips taking mine hungrily. 'Bella I need you too much.'
I Love You, Bella
"'Be naked with me now, Bella.' His voice was low over my shoulder, my heartbeat picking up slightly at his sudden close presence behind.
I turned to him and slowly removed my clothes. I stood before him as he slipped out of his jeans and boxers. He smiled at me before leading me softly to the bed. Edward climbed in next to me, pulling my body onto his to kiss me deeply for several minutes, his hands roaming over my back. He rolled us over so that we were facing each other.
'I love you, Bella.' He whispered to me.
I hummed my reply, kissing him, needing him to come into me. He pulled his face back to smile happily at me. His voice was tender and slow. 'I love how your voice sounds when you say my name. I love the way your fingers move when you are brushing a strand of hair from your face.' He kissed my nose. 'I love your laugh when I make a bad joke; it's sweeter and sillier than the laugh you make for my good ones. I love how your hands tremble when I play you your lullaby and how you stop breathing sometimes when you are listening to my voice.' He chuckled, kissing my neck. 'See? Breathe, Bella.'"
Everything
"His hands moved to my face his thumbs stroking my cheeks. 'I love how your eyes narrow at me when I tease you, so sexy and playful. I love the taste of you and the feel of your soft skin under my fingers. I love holding you while you sleep, but I love holding you when you're awake even more.'
I looked at him, resisting the urge to speak, sensing there was more he wanted to say. There was. Edward softly told me the story of how he fell in love with me, things I knew but we never talked about anymore. How he thought he hated me the first day he saw me, because he felt like a monster; he'd felt as though he had a safe life, a life he could predict and understand, and when I came into his world he had no control. He told me how he watched me, my quiet mannerisms, and my clumsy demeanor. He described how he was completely stupefied to find himself falling in love with me, he was scared, self-loathing, exhilarated, awkward, and lovesick. He told me how I surprised him at every turn, how I was fearless when he expected me to be terrified, how I was strong when he expected me to collapse, how I was sassy when he expected me to be intimidated, how I was forgiving when he expected me to be ruthless. His laugh was gorgeous next to my skin. He told me how he felt to be near me, how it made his throat burn, his body ache, his mind clouded. He told me how he struggled to be with me, to love me without hating himself. He told me how my lips felt against him the first time we kissed. He told me how much it tortured him to stop when I kissed him back, my arousal pushing into him like a fog. He described how I felt underneath him the first time we made love. He told me he knew my body better than I did, how he read my body better than he read anyone's mind.
Edward was silent for a minute, and then told me how sorry he was that he left me. I tried to stop him here but he pressed his lips to mine to silence me. He told me he would work every day to earn my forgiveness. He told me how sorry he was that he couldn't give me a family.
Then, his voice softened and he told me about his day, that he was proud of himself for being able to stitch me up, that he was sorry he snapped at me in the morning, but he had had a good talk with Alice. He told me that he loved seeing me with his family, that his family adored me, that he wanted me to see our future with them.
He told me everything.
I was mute; I was stunned into silence. He watched my face, his lips grazing my jaw.
'What is this about?' I couldn't stop the tears from spilling onto my cheeks and pushed them away, wanting to clear my vision.
He smiled at me, chuckling. 'I tell you those things - well, some variation at least - every night while you sleep.'
I pulled back from his face, blinking. 'While I sleep? Every night?'
He nodded, his expression shy. 'I figured I should say it to you when you're awake sometime. I figured that you might want to hear it.'"
Hard and Delicate
"I climbed on top of him, kissing him with abandon, pressing my hips into his, grabbing his hair hard with my hands. His hands hesitated for a moment before tangling in my hair, his body arching to mine. He moved beneath me; hips pushing up against my ass, his moans loud in my mouth. He was shaking. We were a tangle of limbs, hot and cold. Hard and delicate. I moved lower on his body, pulling his legs around my ribs as I pulled him into my mouth, bringing him to me, tasting him, his hands never leaving my skin until he was close, reaching back to grab a pillow. He groaned, pushing his hips against me, moving in my mouth, faster, his hands ripping the pillow underneath him."
You Are My World
"He pulled me up to him and flipped me onto my back, his eyes watching mine. 'Bella...' he whispered. 'So good...' he moved his hips against me. He waited a long moment, seeming to be silent communication with my body, his body coming back to life. He pushed into me slowly.
'There it is. There is my look.' He moaned, his eyes dark, erotic. 'I keep that look in my mind all day long.'....
...'I love you. I love you more than anything in this world,' I moaned, my body careening on the edge, his movements bringing me so close and holding me there. My body squeezed him, my legs pulling him deeper in me.
He gasped, his tongue drew a long path along my neck, setting my skin on fire, his lips speaking against my flesh.' Tell me you need me. Tell me how much...'
'I need you Edward. I need you so much. I can't exist without you. You are my world...'
'Forever, Bella,' he thrust into me, his hands on the side of my face, his lips still moving on my neck. 'Tell me you're mine forever, you belong to me.'
His voice was low, his breath fast, sucking up the air around me, gulping down the smell of my skin. My body was aching, throbbing against him. Realization pushed at the edge of my mind. I whispered, desperate for release, 'I am yours forever, my Edward.' He looked at my chest, the flush of climax creeping over my skin, my breath hitching in my throat. He smiled at me as my body twisted below him.
He brought his hand to my wet flesh, rubbing along the space where we came together. His fingers touched his lips then dragged against my neck, drenching my skin with my scent.
And then he closed his eyes and leaned back.
Edward closed his eyes while he was making love to me.
At that moment, I understood"
Forever, Bella via anntastic23
"I knew that my husband had listened to me, and had meticulously planned to change me like this.
And in the same instant my orgasm came slamming down over me, arching my back up against my husband's cold body, Edward's fist crashed through the headboard, pulverizing the wall behind the bed. I cried his name and screamed my love for him as he bent to my neck."
EPOV
Listen
"I pushed into Bella, wathcing her eyes turn hooded, dizzy with need. Her heartbeat slowed, and then picked up. Slowed and picked up. I listened to the sounds I had memorized, saying goodbye to them, willing to rely only on her movements and soft groans from now on. Her expression drove me to distraction. I lived for the look she made when she felt me inside of her.
I listened to her body, not her heart. I wanted to make sure I knew her body and its movements better than she did, make sure that her heartbeat didn't matter, that I could play her body like ivory without sound.
And I did."
Whispering Love
"I inhaled deeply, whispering my love to her quietly. Her body tensed, her eyes stared at my face as her body began its journey towards climax. I slowed in her, needing to hear her voice, putting my hand against her warm pussy, her skin slippery with her arousal. I needed the smell of her to bring me back from her blood. I dragged my wet hand along her neck, hearing her begin to whimper in earnest, my body moving faster, letting her come."
Thirst
"The scent of her blood and arousal, of my semen on her lips, together with the feeling of my thirst finally given access to her throat, was overwhelming. I closed my eyes to slow my need and bent to her neck, my lips pressing against her pulse.
I wanted to scream.
I wanted to stop.
I wanted to change my mind. I slammed my fist into the bedframe.
She knew. She screamed out my name. She cried that she loved me.
GO!
"I let my teeth bury in her soft flesh, her blood rushed too fast into my mouth as she gasped beneath me. I pulled back before I let any into my throat, kissing her mouth hard, her blood touching her lips as I moaned my love for her, my voice a dry wracking sob. I screamed for the pain she was about to endure. Her hands pulled my head to her, her breath on my ear. 'Go,' she whispered.
'GO!', my mind screamed.
I bent and drank...
...The sound of her heart. The blood rushing into my mouth. All I could feel: the need to drain Bella.
I was killing her. Again.
Saving Bella
"And then:
Our meadow.
Bella's laugh. Bella buried in a parka standing by her truck. Bella's hand in a nervous gesture on her ear. Bella falling and my arms reaching out to catch her. Bella's soft mouth on mine, moaning my name. Bella's looking over her shoulder at me, her eyes pushing me to lose control.
And in that moment, I felt my body hard, still inside her. I heard her soft whimpers, the smell of me on her breath. I felt her body writhing beneath mine.
I opened my eyes. Bella's hair in my face. Bella's skin under my grip. Bella's blood on my lips, on her lips...
...'Carlisle.' I whispered. He burst into the room...
'It's all going as it should.' He reassured me, his face relaxing. 'Better, actually. She is quiet.'
I worked to not sob agianst her in relief, to not lose my mind over having not killed her. I resisted burying myself in her neck and crying dry sobs of joy. I pushed every thought I had towards reducing her pain. Towards getting her through the next few days.
I whispered to her about our future. I held her while she silently burned, having given her the last human experience I could manage: her sexy vampire cliche'.
I buried my face against her neck and waited for my wife, my life, my everything to come back to me.
Review by miztrezboo:
"Oh Lola that was brilliant! Why I didn't read it before MYMN is beyond me and its felt like a guilty sin to sit here all day and read it in one straight session.. not even stopping for food ;)
It was everything I think we ALL wanted to see or know that happened on Isle Esme without the appearance of the thing that we shall not speak of and her arrival in less than 9mths ;)
Brilliant. I loved the little moments she had with all her new family members, especially the talks with Jasper and Emmett. You made them even more real than they ever were in the books.
And the end.. the end was wonderful. That he finally listened to what she wanted, what she needed and succumbed to something that might have scared him, terrified even, but he still did it for her.
WONDERFUL STORY! ... now the question is whether to go back to work or indulge in the sequel right this second... ;)"
Review by manyafandom:
"Lola, Lola, Lola. I have read many a version of the honeymoon on Isle Esme and Bella's change. And this one was the best of the fucking best.
Edward's change in demeanor and how he acts around his family is so true to character and something we never got to really see in the books. He's light and in love as a newlywed should be. He knows what he is going to have to do. But he doesn't let it weigh on him or ruin his time with Bella. Also the way he was so in tune to Bella, her body and her needs is something that is realistic with the books. How he would take her physical cues and anticipate her needs.
And oh my holy fuck!! It was smutty and sweet and steamy and tender and loving and arousing and it's all so perfectly balanced and woven together to make this more than a smut story.
The Cullens are funny and welcoming and want Bella to be apart of their family, not for Edward's sake or as thank you for his change. But because of genuine affection and love that they all feel for her.
You so nailed it on the head with the Jasper/Bella friendship. That is exactly how I see their relation/friendship. Both being at ease with each other, both giving the other what they need without even knowing it.
This is fantastic and I thank you for sharing it."
Review by gkkstitch:
"As I read Twilight for the first time and watched them fall in love, I remarked to family and friends that I was glad SM wasn't taking the "easy way out." She let them be together. She let them share quiet nights in Bella's room. She didn't use the same old tired reasons why they shouldn't be together. As much as it killed me, I understand New Moon, and there were things done to make it a good story, if not an easy story. Eclipse and Breaking Dawn were again, good stories. Not easy stories. There were GREAT moments ("You don't want to be my wife" ::melt::)
...but this... your story... this is all how it could have been. Action? Not so much. Sorry for it's absence. No. The real world kinda sucks, some days more than others. In our imaginations, we need the happy stories, the emotional stories, the personal dramas, the intense love that just blows you away.
You gave us that with "Let Your Light Shine" and more. Edward's confession, "I love you more ever day, it's making me crazy." And the things he said to her, about how he fell in love with her, and ending with everything he did that day..." and then he shyly admits he says these things to her EVERY night, while she's sleeping. OMG, I fell in love with him myself! Just one little word... SHY in his admission exploded that scene right out of the atmosphere.
And then out of the galaxy, when we learn he planned all of it. That he was saying goodbye to her body's reactions, and his understanding that SHE KNEW what he was going to do, and breaking down in Carlisle's arms.
you. are. a. flippin'. GENIUS!"
Great quote via sandythesandstorm:
"I sobbed into Carlisle's neck. I didn't care that I was naked. I didn't care that Emmett was moving into the room, covering Bella's still form with a blanket, washing the blood from her neck with a wet rag. I didn't care that I was hysterical in my father's arms."
As much as it pains me to be done with Let Your Light Shine, we do still have the sequel. I will post the CPOV of Chapter 17, next, I just thought it was appropriate to end here as Lola herself did, since this was so perfect in and of itself. I hope everyone who is coming here is enjoying this journey, I know that I have had a blast doing this, and only wish I could make this into a movie, but alas, the pictures and our imaginations will have to do. Thank you everyone who has told me they are enjoying this as much as I am, I sincerely appreciate it.
*Thank you so much to anntastic23 for help on Chapter 17, I could not have done this without you.
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